What Planet Is This? You Make Me Cool Road To The West The Egg And I go back go back
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grumpyaxemurderer
User: ruanna
Name: grumpyaxemurderer
about me
Grace is 21 years old this year, and promises to blog about the many thrilling, heart-stoppingly exciting, fun things she has resolved to do this year. Or she might just whine about her life, and the lack of thrilling, heart-stoppingly exciting, fun things happening to her.
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Back February 2010
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The Chaos Butterfly strikes!
ruanna
I have been poisoned! Poisoned by FOOD. It is fascinating, I am not hungry. This is unprecedented. I have also been very unproductive today. That part is slightly more normal.

Saw the most adorable undies at topshop the other day - a glow in the dark monster print. Sadly, all sizes but mine. D: My loins shall remain un-monstered.
ruanna


There is nothing quite so terrifying as sending work out to people and waiting for their response. Why don't they reply to your email? Do they hate it? Did you do something wrong? Did they expect something different?

Rghhh.

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ruanna
2010 has been good to me. So far the new year has been filled with the people in my life showing up and showing me how much I'm going to miss them over the next year. Tonight was a dinner with the extended family, and squashed into a tiny corner and teaching my cousins to play settlers (and then watching them totally crush me) and get terribly excited over sheep. Talked to xy on msn and realised how completely out of touch i am with the people i spent 4 years bonding in sleepless nights with. And earlier today eating dim sum with DELARS and playing BSG again for the 2nd day in a row (cylon leader, won; cylon, lost)

It's terribly trivial, but I also miss writing down the minutiae of everyday life. I haven't kept a personal personal journal (which i did for a good 3 years) since 2007. And having lost that personal personal journal, along with the process of writing out of thoughts, events, and such humdrum daily borings, it feels as if I've somehow lost that time in my past as well. As if the past two years were spent in some limbo, where I can barely recall what I did, what I felt, how I lived. This year (and more to come, hopefully) will be chronicled, here and privately. In a way it makes up for the shortcomings of my memory; a thousand happy moments are lost just due to the sieve that my brain is. Writing thoughts out, like drawing out sketches, clarifies and solidifies your thoughts, making them not just corporeal but also serving to refine the idea, the design. In school they used to teach us that it isn't real until it's on paper.

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Current Music: I'm Alive - Aaron Tveit (Next to Normal OBC)

ruanna
WIP - logo for a theatre company.

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ruanna
Scott Lynch is releasing free chapters of a online serial novel called Queen of the Iron Sands. Sigh. As much as I am happy that you are at least writing, I can't help but wish you were writing Locke Lamura faster, Mr Lynch. :( To his credit he says that it's already written, and just waiting to be put online. And that the long dry spell was due to personal stuff. The first two chapters are up, and it's about a WWII WASP named Violet who mysteriously ends up on Mars. It's not very long, and a light easy read so far. (I am still not fond of first person though)

Wheel of Time is finally going to hit the shelves again! Two years after Jordan kicked the bucket, replacement writer Brandon Sanderson is almost done! We can expect book 13 to hit the shelves before the end of the year. But wait, that's not all - in the true spirit of Robert Jordan, Sanderson is writing not one, not two, but THREE new WoT books to finish the series. Oh joy. He's even said that he needs to take a break before starting on book 14. I couldn't help it, I just had to google Sanderson to check if he was in any danger of going belly up before he finishes the series. (Fingers crossed, he's only 31!) But well, TOR has released the first chapter for download on their website here. Woohoo. A self confessed Jordan fan has a glowingly positive review of the book up - and the first chapter looks promising, even if I couldn't remember reading just about all the major events they remind you of. Little hint of happy nostalgia, and really I just WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS ALREADY. Ahem. Sorry. I suspect I will be 30 before I see the end of this series.

Free books! HERE. Wow. This is the real deal, people. These aren't nanowrimo unbetaed books by bored engineers, these are real proper books from real proper writers. I haven't gone and downloaded any yet, but the front page alone has Terry Brooks Magic Kingdom for Sale and China Mieville's Perdido Street Station. I spot a few romance novels as well, for the so inclined.

As much as I am a fan of old school paper books, there's something to be said for ebooks. I will be even more appreciative of them once I figure out how to upload books onto my handphone, something which I know people have been doing for at least what, 7, 8 years now? Sigh.

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ruanna
Rock Band Crowdsources song creation. Anyone can make a Rock Band song and release it for purchase! Well. By anyone I mean a person who owns the song recording and publishing rights, who has experience with multitrack recording software and is willing to fork out $100 a year for the right to create tracks. Also a major bummer, the new network is only going to be available on Xbox 360, with Sony 'working on' a version for the playstation. Oh well.


Summer Glau joining Dollhouse! Whoa. Summer Glau, Jamie Bamber, Alexis Denisof are all joining or guest starring on Dollhouse season 2, which is rapidly shaping up to be ten kinds of awesome. If you've been following Dollhouse and haven't caught the unaired 13th episode, Epitaph One, RUN don't walk to catch it. If you haven't, I suggest you ignore most of season one and jump straight to this coda. Whedon says the 2nd season will follow from the crazy cliffhanger of episode 13, and if it lives up to a fraction of the awesome it will still be great. Also, Eliza Dushku looks super hot in the link. Can almost forgive her for all the mediocre acting.

Mmm and yes, i AM working. For like, a month or so - just another temp job. Also working on some graphic design stuff. I begin to wonder if I should just do a part time course or something while working instead of running overseas. Meh. Despite my post-holiday resolution of 'no more shopping for the rest of the year' I find I've already spent over $100 on clothes I just HAD to get. Bad Grace.

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ruanna
A few thoughts on approaching 24.

I think the older I grow the more I long for stability and routine in life. I'm a little behind on the curve when it comes to most things in life, I think I have trouble with change and tend to resist stepping into unknown territory.

It's strange, when all my classmates were still in school and I was out, I steadfastly resisted getting a steady job, the very idea was depressingly terrifying. Yet somehow a year later nothing has changed in my life - yet everyone else is moving on. And the prospect of entering the working life is now less daunting.

I guess if this is my quarter life crisis, then we're easing back down to yellow. And it was indeed a crisis, even if the full extent is only apparent to me. Things change, you adapt or life goes on, with or without you.

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ruanna
A line has been crossed, Borders. For a while now I've noticed (as I'm sure most of you have) that books in Borders tend to be tattier and more worn than those at Kino. But the last few times I've gone in looking for a book, they've never been in stock. And yet I still keep going back and looking and asking the staff to check. This time I was looking for China Mieville's latest book (which I'm about a dozen pages in, and it's actually first person and reading like a crime/detective novel, very odd for an author who normally writes fantasy) and surprise surprise they don't have it in stock. Considering it's a relatively recent release (May) I'd really expect it to be stocked. But that's not the whole problem. Placed at the side of the shelves (where you'd stack new books) was Naomi Novik's Victory of Eagles which was released last July. I point out that the last time I came looking for this book it wasn't in stock at Borders. Neither was PTerry's Nation, and they had Gaiman's Graveyard book but not with the cover I wanted. What on earth is the point of bringing in a huge number of hardcover books a year after even the paperback has been released? Honestly.

To add insult to injury, they've started putting the paranormal romance books with the scifi/fantasy sections. WHAT??? If you're not familiar with the genre, think True Blood (HBO TV thing based on books by Charlaine Harris) or like Twilight but targeted at adults instead. (Twilight's a bit more towards YA) WHY are these books taking up SHELVES of space in the scifi/fantasy sections? (no really, SHELVES) WTF, Borders. Bad vampire/werewolf romance does NOT belong in scifi.

As usual I found the book I wanted after wandering over to Kino. Annoying female staff directed me to the wrong shelf too - book was still on the new book tables. -_-
ruanna
So I got pickpocketed in London.

I keep thinking about the theft - and it is quite silly of me really. To not have been suspicious of the people hanging around behind me. To not have moved away earlier. To have chosen to carry that bag, with just a clasp and clicky things instead of a zip. To imagine that it would be hard to open it. To sling it on one shoulder instead of across. To have kept the spare cash in the wallet. To have left my ic there when my parents told me to take it out. I think i owe them an apology for that.

Isn't hindsight a bitch?

At the end of the day though, I know I tend to be unaware of my surroundings. If I'm in an unfamiliar place. With unfamiliar people. I'd be more likely to be careful. But in general I seem to live with my head in the clouds. And i'm not really sure how i would go about changing that. I spent a lot of time in London on my own being lost. I would walk, and think, and suddenly realise that I had been wandering aimlessly. I had no clue where I was going, but my feet were just operating independently.

It's the longest holiday I've been on, and it doesn't quite feel like a holiday anymore. But then this is 3am Grace speaking. Undoubtedly 11am Grace will be much happier.
ruanna
if all your emotions are chemical then surely it is possible to regulate them? i would happily sign up to get 'fall in love' injections with another person and live simulatedly ever after jabbing each other daily. i wish life could be that simple.
ruanna
i have something 1000x worse than asian redness. Two sips of alcohol and my ability to spill things (already v high) magnifies tenfold. :(
ruanna
It was cathartic. I feel very mellow now. It's like i know there are things i shouldn't be happy about but i'm just not feeling them. It wasn't perfect but i am not angry about it.

Spoilers under the cut. Warning for random disconnected thoughts.
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There's never a finale that everyone loves. In a way, the finale of a show is as much for the writers and creators as it is for the fans... As much as I wish I had more from the last two hours, I still loved it. I bet it's all those hormones from the damn crying.

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ruanna
just got home from rehearsals
i'm off work tomorrow

FINALLY I HAVE THE TIME TO WATCH THE BSG FINALE
ruanna
Hah. So did anyone else watch the latest episode of BSG? I kept thinking HI PC! WHEN IS MAC GONNA TURN UP?

spoilery!Collapse )

I just have to also say that BSG is kicking the asses of everything else on tv these days, especially House. HOW much do I hate the current loooove subplot? I know House(and all tv really) is barely believable in terms of real life logic, but it’s the job of the writers/director etc to suck us in and make us forget all that. These past few episodes are all FAIL.

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ruanna
Antihistamines are like magic pills. Woo.
ruanna
I really hate organising parties, yet i like having them. Honestly it's such a pain to pick the right day so the most number of people will come and then you gotta ponder who to invite and who won't come if you invite who and who needs to be invited if you're inviting that other who and then you know everyone's gonna be late and why is the damn group of people so big anyway.
ruanna
Exhausting and painful and yet exhilarating. Despite a bad start, with rain and mud and a slipper that kept breaking, i actually stayed on the bike for a fair distance, and that was really thrilling. Unfortunately when i stopped i actually started to see flashing colours and felt kinda woozy for a while. Ran into an old man who saw me struggling and came over to fix my gears, adjust my brake and give some advice. :P So i learnt how to brake, realised i'd been pedalling on super high gear - but i was kinda really tired by that time and i bailed out to go home. Oh well, maybe i'll see friendly old man in the park another day :) I love having random encounters with strangers.
(okay not that old, like my dad's age i guess but in really good condition - running topless in the park and doing multiple pull ups)

(omg so tired)

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ruanna
The new year has started well, with happy shiny new ideas for personal projects, but i found myself checking out wine glasses on moss? I thought these $70 for two champagne flutes designed by Gropius were expensive?


And then i found a set of astoundingly beautiful mouth blown flutes - 6 for EIGHT HUNDRED DOLLARS.

Considering how easily wine glasses seem to get chipped, I can only covet from the safety of my computer screen. :(

ETA: Oh my. Among the other bizarre things sold by moss - gay marriage finger puppets, jade peace ring, panda chair (i assure you that whatever comes to mind when you think of a 'panda' chair, this will defy all expectations) and some pretty things, candy dish and a strip bracelet.

Err. Sorry for the large amount of clicky, but ctrl/cmd + click will open in new window and that's what tabbed browsing is for, right? :D
ruanna
over the past few days. People I haven't seen in years popping up in odd moments. One dream in particular was of a house - dreaming of rafters and mezzanine levels and stairs - i moved and designed and it appeared as i thought it. I woke up itching to pick up a pencil. It's strange, despite how much i hated school in my last year, 6 months later i find myself digging up my old projects to redesign. Hampered by the lack of Autocad.

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Current Music: Queen - Who Wants To Live Forever

ruanna
I took my brand new shiny red bike out for a ride today! Well okay I lasted all of maybe 15 minutes in the outdoor carpark before it started drizzling. And i was kind of tired so i went in. K says i am 'the most unfit person she knows'. I concur.

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Current Mood: woot